So how do I write about a DREAM I had 20 years ago…?

So how do I write about a DREAM I had 20 years ago…?

About the JOURNEY towards that DREAM that started 18 months ago? Then , about the 10 days that saw the DREAM come TRUE ? Come with me, I want to tell you, but how can I possibly tell it all in one story?

That’s what I’ve been toiling over in the last week since coming from from the Ultimate Tarmac Rally … 

The “Targa Tasmania” 2015

So , yesterday afternoon I was doing what I was supposed to be doing (don’t ask lol) when from out of nowhere , KABOOM – I went Dysreflexic (bad very bad) if anyone wants to kill some brain cells and freak out just google :

Autonomic Dysreflexia 

Have you done that ?

I don’t know how to put it into words simply, but it’s kind of a heart attack of the nervous system – only it can’t be controlled by the brain – the heart beat and blood pressure goes way beyond anything the brain could control , they taught me all about it when I was living in the spinal unit @ 9 years ago – and ,, it’s truly a medical emergency – you can die within the shortest time – many do – lost a few mates I went through the unit with that way . I remember listening to the dr teaching me about it and sounded like it was ??

No Bueno ? Muchas :-(((
An …. Understatement of Biblical Proportions !!

I remember thinking about it as we went through the symptoms and action plan when it presents , I thought , and asked him ?? how will I know if I’m going Dysreflexic ??? The look on his face ??? (One I will never ,, EVER forget) Spoke volumes about the answer …. Well he replied – don’t worry ,, you will know – oh ok – and about 3 months after I was discharged I awoke one afternoon to meet this condition – the pain is unlike any I or anyone who has had this happen can explain – I’ve had over 20 surgeries and surgical procedures in the last 9 years and dare I say ? Some pretty massive ones – when your at the pub and someone shouts ? “Scar Comp” some blokes got some wicked wounds which they proudly show off ,, the ohhhh and ahhhh’s come fast n furious , well , then I roll over , pull down the shirt and turn around — that’s when everyone goes silent – I so win those comps !!

I’ve had post op wake ups that would make your stomach turn and Ya hair go grey with pain BUT – nothing , ever , compares to going dys ? It’s the kind of pain you think ? When u feel it ??

OMG this is what you must feel when your about to die – it’s that BAD – you can actually feel so much pain in your brain , you REALLY think , WOW , this is what you feel like when the lights go out !!! It’s unforgettable and alarms even the hardest of disabled persons – I’m not trying to be dramatic , just factual …. basically….

I’d rather have 2 wife’s and drink wasps than ever have to know that pain again even for a minute – word !!

Over the last 9 years I’ve only ever had that one serious episode , one minor one , and one I wasn’t sure as I found the cause instantly , you see that’s the funny thing ? The moment you find the cause – could be something so small , like a blocked catheter ? The very instant you remove the cause ? It’s like turning off a light switch – it stops INSTANTLY — from hell to salvation in a split second — but you do have one serious headache TFS – first thing you do is spray nitroglycerin under your tongue to help shrink the expanding capillaries in your brain — another headache comes with that on its own , add the 2 together post episode ? Well it’s deffo gunna be a bad hair day haha :-)) If can’t find the cause ?? well – it’s only a matter of time and the bloody capillaries in the brain expand faster than a armed bricklayer in Baghdad – the heart and blood pressure increase way above anything imaginable and ?? BOOM >> You die – lights out – all she wrote – Tata –

It’s that bad – I swear on a bible and with spinal cord injuries – it’s still one of the last frontiers that medical science doesn’t have answers for , things happen that should be impossible – and you can ask the best consulting specialist in the field , heck in the world , why does this happen – the reply…? Truthfully…?

We really just don’t know !!!

Example: ok so I don’t sweat below my original break line , pre SYRINX (Google is your friend) so from just under the underarms , I don’t sweat – ever – the brain tells the body when to sweat ? No Comms and so you can’t right ? Wrong , I have a 10mm square patch on my right pec (pectoral muscle) that sweats like a German Baker in a sauna – why I’ve asked many an expert ? Yep you guessed it – it can’t happen – but it does ?

Go figure , as we say in the unit , Spinal Cord Injuries (SCI)

SCI – The gift that just keeps — Giving !! 

At least you can forget about your herpes — haha — Ya gotta laugh yo :-))

Now back to yesterday afternoon , it happened , fully blown dys , I’d say the worst I’ve ever felt – yes , the worst , and for ***ONLY*** the 2nd time in my Life –

I asked for an ambulance – oufffffff – say you didn’t just say that !!!!

>>>> I do NOT like to do that , Eva TFS !!! Then I was remembering the last time I did that ?

>>>> it didn’t turn out so well ???

Whilst it was happening (aside watching “Days of our Life’s” & singing Kumbaya) I was screaming for HELP , the call was made – There I was on the bathroom floor —– waiting for the ambo , I couldn’t find the source , the waves of dys were passing through and with each one , me buggered head felt like it was being held down face first and a huge hammer was being smashed into the back of my head – it just got faster and harder – faster and harder – (hey you , stop that – I know what you were thinking) I was having waves of spasms and with each wave , throwing me backwards like an epileptic having a fit – I was truly scared and it took me back to that time I was floating in the water – waiting for the Careflight helicopter to come and rescue me – funny I remembered many things I’d forgotten about those 2.5 hours in the water – I remember telling one of my best and most loved mates I’ve ever been blessed to know Mr JP1 – I remember saying to him as I was losing the fight .. I couldn’t breath anymore felt like a ruddy great TRUCK was on top of me (found out later I’d actually had 2 heart attacks whilst floating there that’s why I couldn’t breath) – said dave m8 if that chopper didn’t get here soon ? I thought I wouldn’t make it ? Can you imagine thinking that ? I mean really thinking – for the second time in an hour , shyt ? I might die – wat the ? I remembered just how scared I was then and was again now – would I ever see my wife and kids again ?

It’s not till you actually consider that you may never see your family again , for real ? 

You want to find what your made of ? 

Pray you never have to consider such thoughts – it’s more than a Koala can BEAR :-))  

That’s the funny thing (NO , not the Koala joke) when the accident happened , I didn’t even see what happened , it was all behind me , I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time – simple as that – I fell forward and I hit my head on the bow bending (and exposing) my neck on entry to the water and the bloody sand bank hidden underneath – I heard a cracking sound twice – hmmm weird I thought ??

Well I took a deep breath and pushed back up off that crack pipe ,, decades ago -)))

I started to slide down into the water – I couldn’t move anything at first – spinal shock – I watched as the top of the water which was being kissed by the early sunrise above – so surreal – slowly it started disappearing from my view – I could see the light slowly fading and the darkness grew around me , it’s not like you say to yourself ?

Oh – bugger , I have just sustained a spinal injury and am in shock ???

You just can’t understand why you can’t move – why can’t you swim – why your body doesn’t work or move – all this whilst your freaking DROWNING and starting to suck in salt water – ummm excuse me but ? what’s happening here ? Then like a sham-wow commercial ? You think ?

I think I am going to die ?        

Bet that’s gunna HURT !!

I was scared , alone , in the dark , it reminded me of my first sexual experience ?? Well ?? I was alone then also – boom boom , ok moving right along Pls , Golllly , let’s back up off the gutter and back into that moment – you know what happens if you hold laughter inside ? It escapes from another valve – but , well , erm … let’s NOT go there !!!

OK – I can NOT breath – what just happened ???

The wait for the rescue was long , I was loosing the fight , so much goes through your mind – well yesterday and last night it was all happening again and I thought – (yes by now my head is hurting just from thinking !!! Hey I’ve always said I was the blunder down under & I resemble that remark) back to the story again – wow – this could be the time I say goodbye – you don’t know but if it happened ? You wouldn’t be surprised — the pain is so overwhelming – you imagine – it could well be ?? this is the beginning of the END –

And damn – I forgot to shave –)))

You see – I hadn’t written this post yet – how could I leave without sharing one of the greatest things that’s ever happened to me with all my mates friends and family ? So as I lay in the ER/ED I kept thinking I need to tell everyone about the Targa – so I’m taking a stab at telling YOU about this DREAM that come true – but I need to do it now and as fast as I can – OK , let’s make a start —->>>>   Hmmmm but where to start ?

And how can I tell every part , feelings , emotions , etc etc – I realized I couldn’t — not in one post – how do I reference 18 months of time , 10 days of the trip , 7 days of the Targa – ALL in one post ? How can I shorten it and do it fast ? How can I thank someone who , made the dream So Much MORE – well I’ll get to my HERO – on another post u bet LS !!!

The story started about 20 years ago when I heard of the TARGA TASMANIA ?? I know anyone of my vintage will NEVER forget Smokey and the Bandit – the cannon ball run – I knew I wanted to do this Targa Tasmania (TT) – and I was @30 years old , life was great , single , I’ve always been into 2 things , cars and another passion – more on that L8TR – I was buying and selling some exotic and prestige cars for fun – and I had bought a spanning new 1995/6 Porsche Turbo – from my M8 and Peer JB (John Briggs) was the new 993 generation turbo and to this day still one of the greatest – it had a full Recaro interior with race seats and I thought – this would be the PERFECT TT Car ???

BUT , BUT , a boy meet a girl , and he married that girl , and surprise surprise surprise mr pile – I became a father , the dream of competing in the TT got put on hold as the wife and kids took over and trashed my life – in a whole bunch of different directions – bugger – ha – I was married with kids and bought a station wagon – I’m guessing many mates who are reading this will understand – life direction change – TT was on hold – NEVER forgotten , just on hold , then , in 2006 one day I woke up just like any other day , I walked out my front door just like I had always done , seemed like it would be like any other Thursday – sadly I never came home the same way again – Id suffered a high and complete (severed) spinal cord injury and spent a huge chunk of a year living in a spinal unit – when I finally came home I was a very different person – on the outside (still deluded inside of course that will NEVER change) to say the least – the life I’d worked so hard for (AND boy did I work hard to get to that point) and loved to bits ? Was gone – and now I was basically 2 arms and a head (anyone who knows me knows ? The head ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed as it was ,, being hand feed spoonfuls of cold fish pie in the units acute care – well it didn’t get any better ) .

– A whole new world was before me –

2 types of people left the unit as I could see ? Those who walked out and those who rolled out (always wanted to be a roll model) – I knew I would be the later – I wouldn’t walk out but the first goal I set myself before being discharged was to get my drivers license back and DRIVE myself home – funny how that goal became such a struggle and proved so hard to do – but I did drive myself out one day !!

Whilst still an inpatient , I wanted to learn to drive again , when you land in the spinal unit – all your licenses are cancelled – dunno how that happens , but it does (funny is that my marine commercial skippers ticket was never revoked ? I could by law drive a vessel up to I think 25 meters in open ocean – but I couldn’t drive a corolla out of the car park ? So wrong hey – anyway I fought to make that happen , I would never walk again , I was realistic , and thanks to my God send my new best m8 Josh – I accepted that very early on – but I surely wanted to drive again , with allot of time , energy , assessments and lessons ?? I learnt to drive again using conventional disability hand controls – one had on the wheel and one hand under the dash operating a lever for the brake and accelerator – never 2 hands on the wheel – I would use my one hand on the wheel to Palm the steering wheel around corners – I wasn’t driving per say anymore – driving ? Was more like being a passenger in a bus – driving was only a way to commute , from point A to point B – you were driving true that but you were NOT really driving ?? If you feel me ?? and as such ?

The DREAM of doing the TT – was NOT – put on hold – it was OVER

I could never consider doing an event so grueling , so long and so challenging driving with only one hand on the wheel – BUGGER – it was one of the very last dreams on my bucket list – another thing I lost that fateful day – you see I lost allot more than just walking – I lost control of 85% of my body – not waking ? That was the easiest part – simply it didn’t hurt – I lost the dream to have another child – I lost so much (bladder / bowels / dignity / pride / sexual function / humility / hair / suntan ,, etc etc but again , they were the easiest to loose and to this day I have never got anything back I’d lost. 

Then , 2 years ago when I was attending a disability expo I saw it

  KABOOM  

I saw this new Fly-By-Wire hand control device from Italy , and the lightbulb didn’t just go on it went   BAM!

IF ??

I could master this device ??

And I could drive with BOTH hands on the wheel – if I could do that ???

TT – ???

>>> Is Zero and GO Bubba >>>> The dream is now a possibility – BOOYAA – 

The journey was back on track again and – if I gave everything I had , maybe ? Just maybe ? I could put a tick in that by now remaining bucket list box – pls God grant me this last dream !!!

And the timing ?

Perfecto , you see I spend 3-4 hours everyday , training at my 2nd home , the Sporting Wheelies & Disabled Association – it’s where MAGIC happens for people with disabilities – I’m there everyday and I could see ? Things were not going well – too many staff had to be retrenched – times are tough for charities these days , yet , still all my mates with disabilities came ? Such a PROUD , NOBLE and AMAZING organisation – after so many decades of service was doing it tough – really tough – at the bottom of this post if you haven’t read the history of the aforesaid you will find a link where you can read the fuel that powered this goal , this dream – Pls pls please do have a read if you can spare the time , Big Ups and Thumbs UP Aussie Style 

So – I thought – if I could finally make my TT DREAM come true , and I could find a way to help the SWDA at the same time ? WOW – this would really be SUM THING take me to the MOON 

Then to make it TOTALLY Perfect ?

I’d been looking for away to find something for my son and I to do TOGETHER ?? I wanted to start a tradition with him , one thing we could do together every year – and compete in , we’re both pretty competitive TBH – I always win the gravity race from STANDING to Mother Earth – hey I got less distance to fall – he’s almost 6 feet tall so I try to stick to competions I can win – and when I’m gone I thought (read hoped)he would remember fondly the times (both good and bad , happy and sad) we shared striving for a goal – together 

And there in lies the metric of success for this , one last bucket list tick I needed to fill my dance card ???

***** Done – may 2015 *****

This is a story about a dream that started 20+ years ago , got sidetracked and was blindsided by meeting the girl , having a family , toys were gone , replaced with much smaller toys – ones I couldn’t even use – the dream was on hold , then came the accident – the dream was gone – or was it ?

It’s a story about a disabled person blunder down under who made (with help from his mates and family) the dream come true , he shared it with his son (and best mate) and in so doing ? He helped so many disabled people who had so little to have ? Just a little bit more – it doesn’t get any better – Never could – here is a bloke controlling a maserati – using 4mm of travel for acceleration with his thumb joint and his palm – driving this wicked car in the ULTIMATE Tarmac Rally (as Clarkson USED to say) (~) …. In the World 

Pinch me ? Is it REAL ??

And , my son set the goal of raising $100,000.00 on the way to the finish line for the SWDA – oh we thought , if only – ok I had a plan – but how to make it all come true ? I know in life the things we enjoy the most , the memories that are the most special , the feeling of ecstasy – only comes from the things we put 110% into – we fight for them , we never stop , throwing everything you have into it – overcoming disappointments along the way – absolutely giving all you have and then some – then – IF you get there ? Then ,, and only then ?

IF you get there ? The view ?

……………. Is BREATHTAKING …………

I knew driving in the TT would require more than a car , more than a new and world breaking technology that allowed the Fad Satellite fly by wire (remote control) of pedals from your legs & feet ?? to your thumb and the heel of your palm – you needed to truly learn to drive to the best of the best you can – in the TT you can’t just cruise – the cars set off with 30 seconds distance apart and some stages can go for more than 50kms , the real danger and fear of a driver ?

1/ hurting your navigator (my 14 year old SON)

2/ hurting your self (can’t feel 85% of me so that’s no worries)

3/ hurting the car

But above all that ?

4/ Causing anyone else to be hurt , and it’s when passing another car at high speed round crazy corners on camber off camber up hill down hill , or ALL of the above – more than normal – you have to drive fast yet SAFE !

I set out ?? about 18 months of driving & training , I took as many lessons from my racing coach Mr Paul Stokel – sure pity him if you read some of my early journal posts you can read why – poor bloke – this dude is seriously FAST – could he help me ?? Touch ask , still I did EVERY track day they had , on EVERY track or Circuit there was , I went to every track and training day that were held , I did every drive day I could , I joined a bunch of car clubs so I could do more and more driving , every bloody gymkhana , every sprint , every skid pan day , I knew before I would be safe to my son and everyone on the TT I needed to have , perfect car control – that’s not to drive faster – I haven’t even started that training yet – just to get complete car control – so I could be SAFE – a year and a half of private coaching – we did the Targa HIGH COUNTRY event last year – 3 days of Targa taste – read that post – still things happen for a reason I reckon , sometimes we know why , sometimes it takes years but much of the time if we live long enough we can see , things happen for a reason – well – most of the time – remember the girl – TT HC entry was so we could get an idea of what we would need to do – how it all works – how to read stage notes and operate the rally safe computers – Pls pls if you can spare the time all of these things are posted below on my journal tab of this site – have a look at the journey – in feb we did the Hellyer (Hell-Yer) Targa – all so we could learn how to get the car and us to Tasmania – all this and more – so we could be as ready as we could to enter and start in the TT 2015 and ?? with control of the car so as not to be any bother for anyone !!

But ??

The real metric of success to my navigator (son) and I was to FINSH the TT to see that final ???? with every single stage , under throphy time , that’s what we fought for , strived for , planned for , worked for and with some luck a heart full of faith and allot of Help , DID ??

“It’s something I’ve always dreamt of doing, it’s a bit like a Sydney Hobart or climbing Mount Everest – it’s not about who gets there first, it’s just about who gets there.” The view is the same no matter the time , it will take your breath AWAY !!

I’d been dreaming of it for almost half of my life but to raise $100,000.00 for the SWDA who needed it (again hit the link at the bottom to see the start of this journey) – I had NO idea how hard it would be to raise money , even for the most deserving charity that runs on the smell of an oily rag – the money came in hard and slow – dollar by dollar – it was the hardest thing – I learnt allot about people trying to raise this money – I gave everything I had to find every single dollar I could , and we started the Targa Tasmania 2015 with @$53,000.00 in the SWDA bank account – epic thanks (again and as always) to my life partners – PANERAI – we had another @$21-22,000.00 coming from the proceeds of a special special thing Sotheby’s auctioned for our (SWDA) benefit in Hong Kong in April coming – and I believed we would be sitting around the $80,000 at the end of the month – a brother and tru blu family to me , me m8 Glush had also offered to send a donation of @ £2.5K , and a few more donations were coming , at worst we would end the journey with $85,000.00 of our goal of $100,000 – I could live with that – sure it would be a fantasy to actually meet and HIT that goal , that’s why it was a GOAL after all , if it was to be easy ?? it wouldn’t be as much of a goal now would it ,, But – hey ,, we were close enough – I was happy and appreciative – OMG – Then ? Then ? Then ?

An ANGEL dropped in on me & her dad , A very very SPECIAL kind of Man , and his family did something ?

That TOTALLY blew my mind ?
He and his family with their foundation came to me after the TT and , offered to donate $20,000.00 as he said it best in an email that brought me to tears and that’s the truth >>>>

“just wanted to let you know you’ve knocked off another dream Champ!!!”

CHAMP ??? Who ? Moi ? CHUMP more like it – champ ? That’s what he is !!!

I couldn’t believe him , how could this be true – I’ve never been so appreciative to any single person at any single time than that moment , LS I will spend the rest of my life TRYING to pay YOU and your family Foundation back for this – your staff XMAS party invite has now gone from “Pending” to CONFIRMED , LOLOL , thank to you and ALL ?? now ? If all goes to plan ?

We will HIT our $100,000.00 Target for the SWDA !!!!!!! Tears and nothing but !!!!!!
$100,000.00 raised to help the disabled family I spend half of everyday with , and for the last almost 9 years – from my heart of hearts – I will never be able to express my appreciation to him and his family – he made the dream that came true after 20 years – into the best thing – KaKa – The Dream came TRUE , and the “Fantasy” – went further – just WOW – where’s the tissues !!!!

Ok well – I wanted to try to get that out today , just in case I don’t get another chance (we never know what will meet us @ anytime I’m proof of that) and , whilst the memories from last night were still ?? front and center – I will rather than trying to capture the journey in one post – no way Jose I can’t do it – so every couple of days I’ll post each part day by day with images (the STIG was even @ TT) – so please please do come back and check to read and see the most amazing things – you can follow the journey Pre & Post TT “Report” right here on the site – by going to page 1 and forward the browser page by page , post by post , I’ll add the 10 days from us leaving that front door – till the day after the event – it’s a EPIC story please allow me to share it with you all ….


Now before I close this post down – there is something I have to say – I’m not good at asking for money – I struggle with accepting gifts – and everyone who has ever gone out of their way to help me ? They know I’ve always tried the best I could to repay them in anyway I can , I believe in karma and to receive , one must give first – not always have I been able to repay them in full , but in kind , always , they know that , that matters to me sooooooo MUCH , along this journey , many people HAVE simply blown me AWAY by helping , in SOOO MANY Ways and I will ,, try till the day I depart ,, to repay them in kind …

YOU – yes YOU – reading this ??

YOU know EXACTLY who you are ???

I thank with everything I am and can be – At special times I’ve felt that the words ??? Thank You ????

Just are NOT enough ???

They just can’t express what it means to me , aside trying to repay them in kind , the words :

THANK YOU WITH ALL I AM ???

Are all I have … Thank you thank you and THANK YOU !!!!

Now while I have the chance to offer “Thanks and Appreciation” ??

My THANKS go out to EVERY SINGLE PERSON who gave their time , the officials , the helpers , the TT Staff & Team , my Cams brother , GREG (luv who u r bro) Geoff with all the swanky and functional merchandising , the LADY who actually from day 1 helped at every turn , nothing was a problem , everything was don’t worry , without whom I doubt we would have ever made it ? Dispite being torn in every which way but loose – ALICE – My Star – you go GF , Trace , Mark , Pam and the Crows simply ? everyone and anyone who played a part in making the TT 2015 happen ?

My HERO LS who has afforded us the greatest finish to the dream , I can’t wait to post about what you have done for me – for SWDA – you can bet that you have hit a part of my heart that brought me to my knees ?
(Usually when that happens it’s after a spasm and I’m falling out of the wheelchair to massage Mother Earth)

Sir ? You are simply …… The BEST !!!!!!!

To all of my Sponsors , my Mates , my Family >>> to EVERYONE ???? For EVERYTHING ???

Bucket list – COMPLETE 
BOOYAA WE DID IT ??????????????

Ok …… One last thing , or 2…

Each day or 2 I’ll will try my best as promised to make a post about everything that happened on the TT 2015 – from the time we left the house till the time we arrived home – the greatest blessing I know is that my son and I went out that same front door , and , after a life changing experience ?? We returned the same way we left >>>>

—- GOOSEBUMPS —-

BTW

My wife had said at the start of the madness – if you take our son and you don’t bring him back the same way ??

YOU .. Don’t come back – haha – but she reminded me even when I didn’t need it that I had the most precious cargo onboard – If I hurt myself chances are I wouldn’t feel it anyway so I’m down with that but if I hurt my son ? Well – whilst it was a race , and we did try to keep UNDER Trophy Time – the metric of success for us and the SWDA – as you now know ,, was for us to finish , many did not , it was the hardest thing I’ve ever tried to do in 9 years in the chair – heck it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do in my life PERIOD – I think in the 7 days we were in Tasmania – we drove well over 3000++kms – and with my disability – add the daily management of it taking some 4-5 hours morning , day and night , it was one of those – cowboy up – suck it up – toughen up and – justdoit …….

And to those of you who are reading this, and your not RISTI Aware ??

Risti & Panerai are a Huge ,, HUGE part of my life ,, Sharing a PASSION I have with other like minded and passionate mates – yeah we’re all nutz – were a community , a family and we know no boundaries , we live , laugh and love , not always in that order , we are … The “RISTI” – if I tried to explain it ? Many wouldn’t get it anyway – but it is 110% central to my everyday life and happiness – it’s what helps me escape the misery of my disability everyday – and many a painful night – for the last 18 months I’ve had to turn my back on this part of my life – it’s the longest break I’ve had since 2000 – I owe so many apologies and have too many mates carry my load for me , I’m so , so Sorry M8’s I’ve been dedicated to this journey – but ??

BAD NEWS for you ?

I’ll be back soon — miss u all and thank you for your respect , help , donations and support – to explain the TT to you buggers ? Imagine the greatest PDay that ever was – and it went for over a week ? Yeah – get a bit of that into Ya :-))))))

For what its worth (your mileage will vary) I’m the first person like me , to finish the targa the way we did it – in its 24 year history & my son is one of the youngest navigators to ever finish – talk about PASSION father – son – style u bet !!

———- Just doesn’t get any better than this – ever ———-

The post you simply have to read that says it ALL and WHY , we couldn’t sit back and not – make some magic happen so please if you can spare a few minutes do have a look back in time >>>

http://www.network54.com/Forum/353391/message/1398985191/OT+…+It%27s+Dream+TIme+%2C+Please+M8%27s+%2C+Please+HELP++%26gt%3B%26gt%3B%26gt%3B

To our father in heaven , please boss , can we wait another 9 years before I have to call an ambulance again ??

Please , pretty please , with sugar on top :-))

My head HURTS !!!!

Thanks for taking the time to read this , what can I say —–

It’s been EMOTIONAL —-

Love Ya’s ALL – God Bless and Keep !!!